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BBN: Bagholder Broadcasting Network, live 24/7 market news

890 segments aired today · Live 24/7 · 191 real news outlets credited · Hit the 🔔 so you catch the open and the closing bell

LIVEMARKET OPEN

Market Hours

Live from the BBN markets desk

SPECIAL REPORT

RBI Faces Classic Central-Bank Trilemma, Bloomberg Says

Hank Ledger · Vera Bullock · Dale Bearman

Next show: The Closing Bell

The Bagholder Index

56/100
Diamond handsHolding every bag

Bags getting heavy

From real moves right now: S&P -0.23% · VIX 15.21 · Bitcoin -2.81%. Not financial advice. Not even advice.

Daily game

Call the Close

Up or down at the 4:00 PM ET bell? Call it, then watch the closing bell live and keep your streak alive.

Last close (Tue): S&P 500 +0.58%

Make your call →

The RBI will figure it out, and it will look like genius afterward.

Vera Bullock · SPECIAL REPORT
Real lines from today's broadcast, read by fictional AI anchors.

Live 24/7 on YouTube

What is BBN?

BBN, the Bagholder Broadcasting Network, is a parody news channel that never goes off the air. Fictional cartoon anchors cover real market data and real headlines from outlets across the political spectrum, and every story links back to the outlet that reported it.

  • 41 hon air without a break
  • 3,019segments written and aired
  • 191real news outlets credited
  • 12Margin Callers episodes so far

Every segment is written by AI moments before it airs and read by AI voices. It is comedy: not financial advice, and not a news organization.

Latest Shorts

The desk's finest moments, cut down to under a minute.

All Shorts on YouTube →

A BBN Original · 12 episodes

Margin Callers

Three roommates. One apartment they can't afford. Zero exit strategy.

Chad, Dev and Preston: three Wall Street bros, one-minute episodes, every bad trade and worse date. A new episode airs on BBN every day.

  1. EP 12Peer Reviewed
  2. EP 11Term Sheet Kiss
  3. EP 10Up Is Good, Right?
  4. EP 9One Word Bonus

Just aired

What the desk covered today, with the real reporting behind it. The jokes are ours; the facts are checkable.

Everything from today →
BBN USA

New: B-1 Bombers Pulled Out, Says Washington Post

Vera Bullock: “Two candidates, one podium, zero handshakes. Chip, that's the most Maine thing I've ever heard, and I've never been to Maine.”

SCREENING ROOM

Soul Patrol Trailer, Powell on Running Man, Kids Tablet Deal

Chip Darnell: “Eighty-nine dollars! Kenji, I have seen none of these things and I love every one of them. Back to the desk!”

Headlines on the desk

  • Investing.com Farm equipment stocks after the FTC and USDA joint inquiry: AGCO, Deere and CNH compared
  • Investing.com Florida pursuing court order for Meta teen safety changes
  • CNBC Google ordered to halt work on two data centers in ‘Texas of Europe’
  • Nasdaq Ten-Year Note Auction Attracts Strong Demand
  • Reuters Halozyme wins court order to block Merck's injected Keytruda in select European markets
  • Nasdaq Alphabet's Cloud Backlog Just Topped $500 Billion. Is Google Cloud About to Overtake Search as the Growth Engine?
  • Bloomberg.com San Francisco Passes Data Center Moratorium in Hometown of AI
  • CNBC Modelo owner Constellation is getting creative to bring back beer drinkers as overall demand weakens
  • Investing.com Google expands SynthID Detector tool globally to identify AI content
  • The Motley Fool Prediction: Custom Silicon Will Be the Next Boom Within the AI Supercycle. 1 Growth Stock to Own.
  • WSJ They Paid $50,000 and Waited Nine Years. Will Tesla’s Roadster Live Up to the Hype?
  • Seeking Alpha Micron target lifted to $3000 by DA Davidson on AI memory demand (MU:NASDAQ)

BBN Weather

Brock Thunderson would like you to be afraid.

  • New York66°Fclear
  • Chicago72°Fclear
  • Los Angeles84°Fclear
  • Miami86°Fpartly
  • Toronto21°Cclear
  • Sao Paulo24°Crain
  • London12°Ccloudy
  • Frankfurt21°Ccloudy

On the calendar

  • US FOMC Meeting Minutes
  • US FOMC Member Waller Speaks
  • UK BOE Gov Bailey Speaks
  • US Unemployment Claims