U.S.WEEKEND INTERVIEW
Rachel's surf drives out Long Beach residents, shuts Newport beaches
The storm's waves are the largest recorded in the district's history, according to the Surf Commissioner of Greater Pelican Shores.

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What BBN said about it

Hank Ledger · Lead AnchorTropical Storm Rachel's surf has driven residents out of Long Beach and shut beaches in Newport Beach.

Hank Ledger · Lead AnchorWith us is Barnaby Oyelaran-Smith, Surf Commissioner of Greater Pelican Shores.
Barnaby Oyelaran-SmithHank, those waves are the biggest in district history, and I want it noted that they arrived on my watch. On schedule.

Hank Ledger · Lead AnchorYour watch. People were told to leave their homes.
Barnaby Oyelaran-SmithWhich shows how well the waves are performing. The evacuations, however, were the ocean's decision. I was not consulted.

Hank Ledger · Lead AnchorYou run the surf office.
Barnaby Oyelaran-SmithI run the good surf. The scary surf is a regional matter.
Barnaby Oyelaran-SmithThe brass tide clock agrees with me, and it has only lost one hand.

Hank Ledger · Lead AnchorOne hand.
Barnaby Oyelaran-SmithLost to the water, already, on schedule. Along with a gazebo, two kayaks, and what I would call a modest pier.

Hank Ledger · Lead AnchorA pier is not modest. It's a pier. Who ordered the sandbags?
Barnaby Oyelaran-SmithI cancelled that order immediately, to save you, the taxpayer, money. The soaked sneakers on Fourth Street are a bonus for the economy.

Hank Ledger · Lead AnchorSneakers.
Barnaby Oyelaran-SmithAnd the brass clock now says it is Thursday, but the water is also behind schedule. That is the previous administration.

Hank Ledger · Lead AnchorSo who approved the waves?
Barnaby Oyelaran-SmithThe moon, Hank. Frankly I'd like to list it as a donor. Great turnout, by the way.

Hank Ledger · Lead AnchorNoted. Brock Thunderson is next, and he is going to take this storm very, very personally.


