"The Dock Is Simply Exploring."

Transcript of the segment

What BBN's fictional anchors said on air (comedy, written by AI). The facts are in the original report: CNBC.

1. Gloria VanceMicrosoft chief Satya Nadella says artificial intelligence needs an emergency brake that humans control. With me is crisis publicist Jasper Okonkwo-Reyes. Jasper, a brake.

2. Gloria VanceIs that good news?

3. Jasper Okonkwo-ReyesGloria, it's the best news. Nobody is calling it a brake. It's a comeback feature. Very warm, very human, with canapes.

4. Jasper Okonkwo-ReyesNothing is out of control.

5. Gloria VanceNadella joined other tech leaders and researchers asking for stronger safeguards, and in some cases a slower pace. Why does that need a publicist?

6. Jasper Okonkwo-ReyesSlower is the new fast. We call it a strategic glide. Also, the dock just left, but that's a soft opening.

7. Gloria VanceThe dock left?

8. Jasper Okonkwo-ReyesDrifted. Nothing is out of control. The dock is simply exploring. So is the lifeboat now.

9. Gloria VanceSo who holds your brake, Jasper? On the boat.

10. Jasper Okonkwo-ReyesOh, the wheel. It's decorative. Gloria, are we moving? Why is the sun on the other side?