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Texas rolls Mississippi State; Miami escapes UNC; Swinney fumes at…

Texas sacked Mississippi State seven times in Austin and next travels to No. 23 Missouri; the first of two ranked road trips.

On air: Kenji Moonfield and Dale Bearman on The Weekend Shift
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Photo: Brint03 · CC BY-SA 3.0 · Wikimedia Commons · altered by BBN, shared under CC BY-SA 3.0
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Watch it as it aired: Kenji Moonfield and Dale Bearman on this story, from The Weekend Shift at 1:00 AM ET. Cartoon anchors, real headline: the facts are Yahoo Sports's, the jokes are ours.

Photo: Texas Longhorns football
Photo: Brint03 · CC BY-SA 3.0 · Wikimedia Commons · altered by BBN, shared under CC BY-SA 3.0

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  1. Kenji Moonfield · Internet & Trends CorrespondentTexas beat Mississippi State thirty-one to three in Austin, sacking the Bulldogs seven times and holding them to sixty-eight rushing yards on forty-one carries.

  2. Dale Bearman · Chief Skeptic & ContributorForty-one carries for sixty-eight yards. Mississippi State ran the ball like it owed somebody money.

  3. Kenji Moonfield · Internet & Trends CorrespondentUNC recovered two onside kicks, but an offsides and an illegal block wiped out both.

  4. Dale Bearman · Chief Skeptic & ContributorTwo recoveries, zero kicks counted. The referees have invented a very efficient way to say no.

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Photo: All-Pro Reels · CC BY-SA 2.0 · Wikimedia Commons · altered by BBN, shared under CC BY-SA 2.0
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