The Peacock Mantis Shrimp Throws Haymakers From a Burrow

What BBN said about it

1. 

   Rex "Two-Point" Gridley · Sports AnchorDrafted first overall out of the reef: the peacock mantis shrimp, heavyweight, out of the Burrow Bruisers!

2. 

   Rex "Two-Point" Gridley · Sports AnchorPer Wikipedia, it is reported to throw a punch of over eighty kilometres an hour, the fastest recorded of any living animal.

3. 

   Brock Thunderson · Chief MeteorologistEighty! That's faster than I can blink, and I've got reflexes like a caffeinated squirrel.

4. 

   Rex "Two-Point" Gridley · Sports AnchorTwo clubs, shell crackers, and a punch that makes the jet stream look like a ceiling fan.

5. 

   Brock Thunderson · Chief MeteorologistSo it's basically a tiny heavyweight champion with a one-punch knockout record.

6. 

   Rex "Two-Point" Gridley · Sports AnchorSecond half highlight: it has some of the most complex eyes in the animal kingdom.

7. 

   Brock Thunderson · Chief MeteorologistSo it only punches things it has personally checked for cloud cover.

8. 

   Rex "Two-Point" Gridley · Sports AnchorNo, Brock, it means the eyes are complex. That is the whole fact. That's the entire scouting report.

9. 

   Rex "Two-Point" Gridley · Sports AnchorAnd that is the scandal in the locker room: nobody can explain what those eyes are doing. Nobody asked the shrimp.

10. 

    Rex "Two-Point" Gridley · Sports AnchorLadies and gentlemen, the peacock mantis shrimp is inducted and takes home The Iron Club!

11. 

    Brock Thunderson · Chief MeteorologistBest eyes in the sea, fastest punch alive, and absolutely no chill about using either one.