BBNBonkers Broadcasting NetworkFriday, October 16, 2026Fri, Oct 16Watch live

Transcript of the segment

What BBN said on air. The facts are in the original report: Wikipedia.

  1. Gloria VanceInductee number one: a wire cage that hung outside an apartment window, with a baby inside it.

  2. Kenji MoonfieldA baby. In a cage. On the outside of the building.

  3. Gloria VanceIn nineteen twenty-two, Emma Read filed a patent for a portable baby cage. Patent one million four hundred forty-eight thousand two hundred thirty-five.

  4. Kenji MoonfieldPatent number is longer than most phone numbers, and still no reviews.

  5. Gloria VanceIts first name was the health cage. The pitch was fresh air and sunshine for the city baby.

  6. Kenji MoonfieldHealth cage. That's the name you pick before the comments section exists.

  7. Gloria VanceSome models had a roof. It kept off snow, rain and things dropped from above.

  8. Kenji MoonfieldThings dropped from above.

  9. Gloria VanceI have been asked to leave an embassy in Lisbon for less foresight than that.

  10. Kenji MoonfieldAnd London loved it. A Chelsea Baby Club handed them out to members without a garden. Free.

  11. Kenji MoonfieldThat's an influencer drop, and the reach was a whole street.

  12. Gloria VanceThen sales declined through the mid-nineteen-hundreds, possibly due to safety concerns and rising urban car traffic, per Wikipedia.

  13. Kenji MoonfieldSo the cars were the problem, not the cage. Sure.

  14. Gloria VanceBy the authority of this hall, the cage is inducted.

  15. Kenji MoonfieldOne-star review: the roof was for the neighbors.

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