U.S.HOT TAKE
No Onions? No Problem: Caramelized Fennel Pasta
The recipe makes a sweet, caramelized pasta from fennel alone, with no alliums at all; the onion has apparently been given the day off.
On air: Dale Bearman, Hank Ledger and Vera Bullock on The Five O'ClockPublished
Photo: Alvesgaspar · CC BY-SA 3.0 · Wikimedia Commons · altered by BBN, shared under CC BY-SA 3.0Watch it as it aired: Dale Bearman, Hank Ledger and Vera Bullock on this story, from The Five O'Clock at 4:32 PM ET. Cartoon anchors, real headline: the facts are The New York Times's, the jokes are ours.
At a glance
- First reported by The New York Times: “No Onions? No Problem.”
- Covered on BBN on Tuesday, October 20, 2026, at 4:32 PM ET on The Five O'Clock, by Dale Bearman, Hank Ledger and Vera Bullock.
The real story
The reporting behind this segment. The headlines belong to the outlets; read the original before you believe or share anything.
- The New York TimesNo Onions? No Problem.
What BBN said about it
Hank Ledger · Lead AnchorA caramelized fennel pasta that delivers sweet, caramelized notes without any onions or other alliums, The New York Times reports.
Hank Ledger · Lead AnchorI am the judge, and the thermometer is ready.
Vera Bullock · Co-AnchorHot take: the onion's statement reads, we are thrilled to announce a fennel-led transition, and we will be exploring other opportunities.
Hank Ledger · Lead AnchorNot. The onion did not ask for a healing journey. It was replaced.
Dale Bearman · Chief Skeptic & ContributorHot take: one recipe writer says caramelized fennel tastes very reminiscent of caramelized onions, with more peppery savoriness.
Dale Bearman · Chief Skeptic & ContributorSo fennel has been impersonating onions for years, and nobody checked.
Hank Ledger · Lead AnchorHot. A vegetable with a cover story is the most believable thing I have heard all week.
Vera Bullock · Co-AnchorHold on, you rated my take not and his hot? He just accused a vegetable of fraud.
Hank Ledger · Lead AnchorYes. Yours was a wellness retreat. His had a suspect.
Dale Bearman · Chief Skeptic & ContributorThank you, Hank. Vera, the onion didn't ask for a lawyer, it asked for a lawyer.
Hank Ledger · Lead AnchorMy final take: I rate my own take HOT. Decades of cooking onions, and it turns out they were fennel the whole time.
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Photo: Daniel Torok · Public domain · Wikimedia Commons · altered by BBN
Photo: PhilipRomano · CC BY-SA 4.0 · Wikimedia Commons · altered by BBN, shared under CC BY-SA 4.0
Photo: Solen Feyissa · CC BY-SA 2.0 · Wikimedia Commons · altered by BBN, shared under CC BY-SA 2.0
Photo: Paxson Woelber · CC BY-SA 4.0 · Wikimedia Commons · altered by BBN, shared under CC BY-SA 4.0
Photo: Jack Dykinga · Public domain · Wikimedia Commons · altered by BBN
From the archive: everything BBN aired on Tuesday, October 20, 2026 · the U.S. archive · all months
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