What BBN said on air. Comedy, with fictional anchors.
Vera BullockA man walked onto the Rimac factory campus in Croatia looking for a job, saw a Bugatti Chiron with the keys inside, and drove it away.
Vera BullockZeke Valverde, a lifestyle creator, has turned the whole episode into a sponsored morning routine.
Vera BullockZeke, what does a morning routine around a stolen car even look like?
- ZA
Zeke Amadou ValverdeIt starts at five a. m. Eastern with Pursuit Water, which is just water, but pink. Then you walk onto a campus with confidence. Use code CHIRON.
Vera BullockWalk onto a campus with confidence. He came for a job and left with a car, and then he filed a complaint against the employer.
- ZA
Zeke Amadou ValverdeWhich is leadership, Vera. He took ownership of the situation and the vehicle. Use code CHIRON-FOUR-MILLION.
Vera BullockCode CHIRON-FOUR-MILLION. That's the price Rimac gave for the car, so I assume the discount is zero.
- ZA
Zeke Amadou ValverdeThe discount is a feeling. Step two is the head start. He had one hour. Use code ONE-HOUR-HEAD-START-PLUS-FULL-TANK.
Vera BullockStaff often needed to move the car, Rimac says. So the keys weren't left out. They were pre-onboarded.
- ZA
Zeke Amadou ValverdeI'm saying it's an open-door culture. He hoped to reach Germany, which is ambitious, and I respect a goal. Use code GERMANY-OR-BUST-ONE.
Vera BullockAustrian police stopped him. Ten police cars loaded the Chiron onto a truck, and the only damage was a scuffed carbon-fiber splitter.
- ZA
Zeke Amadou ValverdeSo the routine ends in custody?
Vera BullockRimac declined to press charges, but prosecutors in Croatia and Austria will likely still go ahead. Does your code cover that?
Vera BullockZeke, thank you. Ten police cars, one truck, and your brand still got the pink water in.
- ZA
Zeke Amadou ValverdeUse code HIREME, all caps, no keys required, and it expires when Austrian police say so.
