I Play Rocky: Source in a Parking Garage Confirms Nothing

Transcript

What BBN said on air. Comedy, with fictional anchors.

1. 

   Kenji MoonfieldAnthony Ippolito plays a young Sylvester Stallone in I Play Rocky, and he told Variety the dog co-star was not a huge fan of him.

2. 

   Kenji MoonfieldWith me is a source familiar with the matter, speaking from a parking garage. Sir, what do you know about this film?

3. ZO

   Zbigniew OrrellI can neither confirm nor deny it's a film. It's a film. I have a ticket, and the garage validated it.

4. 

   Kenji MoonfieldIn the trailer, Matt Dillon plays Stallone's father and tells him, "You don't got the looks to be a movie star." Was he right?

5. ZO

   Zbigniew OrrellNo. I can neither confirm nor deny that, but I heard the dad say it. He said, you don't got the looks. Then he parked crooked.

6. 

   Kenji MoonfieldThe father is a character in the film. Ippolito had to go from a skinny build to bulging muscles to play Stallone.

7. 

   Kenji MoonfieldWhat do you know about that?

8. ZO

   Zbigniew OrrellI know the skinny part very well.

9. ZO

   Zbigniew OrrellThe muscle part I can neither confirm nor deny, but I saw a man carry a gym bag across level three.

10. 

    Kenji MoonfieldSo I assume the studio paid for a whole transformation, and the film is about a man told no at every turn.

11. ZO

    Zbigniew OrrellThat was classified until you said it.

12. 

    Kenji MoonfieldLast one. Did the dog like him?

13. ZO

    Zbigniew OrrellI can neither confirm nor deny the dog liked me. I can confirm it wasn't a huge fan of anybody. Validated.