Seahawks Offense Stalls: Fourteen Points Is Not a Lol, It's a Seen

Transcript

What BBN said on air. Comedy, with fictional anchors.

1. 

   Chip DarnellESPN says Man United's Matchday Two ended as a mess while Barcelona and PSG impressed.

2. 

   Chip DarnellAnd Yahoo Sports says the Seahawks scored fourteen in Denver, and their offense has been inconsistent at best.

3. 

   Chip DarnellThe defense is still one of the league's best. So I want hot takes. Gloria, you're first.

4. 

   Gloria VanceThe offense is jet-lagged. Denver is altitude, and I once lost a negotiation in La Paz to a very thin breeze.

5. 

   Chip DarnellThat is a NOT. It was a Denver game, and you were in Bolivia.

6. 

   Kenji MoonfieldHot take: the offense peaked at the Super Bowl and is now just doing a victory lap in the group chat. Fourteen points is a reply that says lol.

7. 

   Chip DarnellLukewarm. Fourteen points is not a lol, it's a seen.

8. 

   Gloria VanceAnd your final take, Chip?

9. 

   Chip DarnellThe defense should run the offense too, and the offense can hold the thermometer. Brock, is it cold enough to score in?